For some weeks now I’ve avoided to go shopping for new bras, since I didn’t want to put myself through the whole ”you’ve gained weight, now you have to get new clothes” thing. It’s one of the hardest things for me.
For most of the time since I’ve been under weight I haven’t used bras, since I’ve been almost completely without any curves. A couple of weeks ago I noticed it actually was getting uncomfortable to go out for a walk without a bra etc. But I still wasn’t ready to face the fact that I didn’t have the body of a 10-year-old anymore.
Today I anyways went to the mall with my mom and I bought myself some bras. It’s something about standing there half naked in a small fitting room with the brightest possible lights on you. My anxiety level was 100.
I haven’t even been in a fitting room at all since I’ve reached a normal weight so the whole thing felt a bit too much. I still think it was a good experience because even though my anxiety showed up (as expected) I still did it and I still accepted the facts that I had gained curves. And I accepted that the sizes I bought were something other than XXS.