Hi guys. It feels like I haven't posted in forever, though it's only been a couple of days. But I'm used to working with my blog everyday so it's been kind of weird taking some days off. My time off social media has been so well needed and it fitted the christmas holidays as well, even though my break wasn't related to that in any way.
Lately I've been struggling a lot with staying positive and motivated since my morning sickness came back. These last weeks my evenings have been close to unbearable, the nausea comes around 3-5PM and lasts until I fall asleep, which I can't do without medication since the nausea has gotten so bad. If you haven't experienced pregnancy sickness it can be really hard to imagine what a nightmare it is, but it's the worst and it affects your well-being and energy in all possible ways. When you're in week 12 and everyone says it will pass anytime now, you still have hope for a pregnancy without nausea - but when you're half way through pregnancy and your everyday life is mostly about trying to avoid nausea, it really sucks.
So I've simply been taking some days off because I've been feeling ill all the time. Also, I've been following some mama accounts on Instagram and it's been SO GOOD to not scroll through these superwoman accounts everyday. When you're laying in bed 24/7 trying not to throw up, it's really (now I mean REALLY) heartbreaking to see these preggy mamas that do gym session after gym session and feel better than ever throughout their pregnancies. I mean, who doesn't wish to have that experience while preggy? Me too. But reality is different and it actually feels a lot better to just unfollow most of the superwoman accounts and just focus on myself for a while. So some time off social media has been kind of nice.
Now to the thing everyone is asking about: am I struggling with eating again? Both yes and no. It's a hard subject for me to write about since I wanna be strong, both for the baby and myself. But to be honest I've been struggling a bit lately and now we're focusing on getting me a balanced diet that I can maintain throughout the pregnancy (and after!). It's funny because I really thought pregnancy would be easy for me. I thought it was an obvious thing that I wouldn't have problems with my body or eating habits when I got pregnant. But in reality it has been getting harder for every week, and I find myself sitting looking at old pictures of a tiny and skinny me, and having a super hard time accepting I can't look like that now. So yes, I would definitely say my eating disorder has gotten worse again, but I'm getting so much support and help, so I do eat at all times even though it's hard.
Have a great day loves. <3